Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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