Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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