i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
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