if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
