my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Randomize