I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize
