I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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