Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
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