It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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