there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
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