omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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