I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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