you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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