if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
