you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
