so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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