i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
