her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
