You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
