I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
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I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
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I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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