all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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