The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
