thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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