Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize