well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
