Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
19 People Did The Wildest Things When They Were Black-Out Drunk
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
21 Signs That A Dude is Probably Insane
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.