Texts From Last Night

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  (646): View more from New York

  Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?

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  (646): Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why? http://tfl.nu/31ky
  Replies (7) Good night (576) Bad night (872)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  how did your night go?

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  he asked for my myspace name.

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  (240): how did your night go? (336): he asked for my myspace name. http://tfl.nu/ulv6
  Replies (4) Good night (653) Bad night (2953)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.

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  (609): Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS. http://tfl.nu/xjwy
  Replies (17) Good night (3222) Bad night (583)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.

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  (908): her vagina looked like a handful of raisins. http://tfl.nu/5whx
  Replies (91) Good night (1311) Bad night (24339)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  When are you freeeeeeeeee?

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.

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  (612): When are you freeeeeeeeee? (612): My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome. http://tfl.nu/b5yi
  Replies (8) Good night (4915) Bad night (1275)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.

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  (253): Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away. http://tfl.nu/2pvy
  Replies (32) Good night (8560) Bad night (926)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?

  (1-978): View more from Massachusetts

  Nah. I did too.

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  (978): Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him? (1-978): Nah. I did too. http://tfl.nu/9ism
  Replies (67) Good night (2634) Bad night (4015)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.

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  (570): You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians. http://tfl.nu/d2bn
  Replies (20) Good night (5929) Bad night (1241)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.

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  (519): I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front. http://tfl.nu/mrrz
  Replies (12) Good night (4588) Bad night (1575)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.

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  (563): I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition. http://tfl.nu/wjlr
  Replies (4) Good night (3473) Bad night (762)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.

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  (617): Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal. http://tfl.nu/pm4h
  Replies (4) Good night (1335) Bad night (2979)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.

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  (630): I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar. http://tfl.nu/ha0p
  Replies (5) Good night (1671) Bad night (1079)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  All she wanted was a cigarette

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  (919): She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop. (919): All she wanted was a cigarette http://tfl.nu/ei15
  Replies (1) Good night (1710) Bad night (645)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.

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  (413): 2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick. http://tfl.nu/06th
  Replies (4) Good night (661) Bad night (1323)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".

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  (614): That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did". http://tfl.nu/a1ua
  Replies (0) Good night (411) Bad night (282)

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