Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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