why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
