OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
