I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
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