i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
