the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
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