I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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