Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize
