That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
