You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Randomize
