Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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