wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Randomize
