I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
