dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
