How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
You don't make any sense
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