STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I just threw up on my dentist
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Randomize
