and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
