you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Randomize
