The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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