It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
