do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
