Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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