Sry I called you an 8
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
