You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
