His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
